March 2011 FROM MY PERSPECTIVE

There are so many events in March for the entire month---
American Red Cross; Music in our schools month; Frozen food month; Noodle month; Nutrition month; Woman’s History month; Youth Art Month; my birthday; and Irish-American Heritage month. I’m part Irish and draw on that heritage especially in wise sayings. Here are some:
A dog owns nothing, yet is seldom dissatisfied; It is better to be born lucky than rich; A lie travels farther than the truth; Never iron a four-leaf clover, because you don't want to press your luck; Put silk on a goat, and it's still a goat; A friend's eye is a good mirror; It's no use carrying an umbrella if your shoes are leaking; God is good, but never dance in a small boat; Even a small thorn causes festering. Marriages are all happy it’s having breakfast together that causes all the trouble; Every dog is brave on his own doorstep; Man is incomplete until he marries---after that, he is finished; You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was. Patience is the poultice of all wounds. The man with the boots does not mind where he places his foot. Love hides ugliness.

True teachers are those who use themselves as bridges over which they invite their students to cross; then, having facilitated their crossing, joyfully collapse, encouraging them to create their own. –Nikos Kazantzakis, poet and novelist (1883-1957) Interesting analysis and analogy. I see this in a good parent, too. It seems teachers and parents, with their subjects, educate themselves right out of a job. I remember one time I was disciplining one of my children. Daddy told me he thought I was a bit hard on them and asked me where I learned that expectation. I turned around and said, “I’m looking at the teacher. You did a good job.” When Mother was ill, I came and took care of her. She looked at me and said, “You surely do know how to take care good care of someone.” I thanked her, smiled, and told her, “I had a good teacher.” Think about the good things our parents have taught us. Don’t we emulate them and the teachings as our life progresses?

There is a little pleasure in having nothing to do; the most fun is in having a lot to do and not doing it. It seems to be a latent rebellious satisfaction. Then, the sense of responsibility kicks in and you’re back to where you were—but, waiting for that moment to reappear; sort of like being a teenager, again. One cannot do right in one department of life whilst he is occupied in doing wrong in any other department. Life is one indivisible whole. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi (1869-1948)

Have you ever noticed that a road map tells you just about everything EXCEPT how to refold it?
How to get a man to leave you alone for a while---Put a sign around your neck which says MUST READ INSTRUCTION MANUAL. Do you know why men whistle when they sit on the toilet? It reminds them of which end to wipe.

My teenaged daughter, Tara, with hair down to her waist, came in to tell me, “Mom, Hanna and Jessica are going to braid my hair!” I reminded her of the encounter about me braiding her hair that she and I had had 30 minutes prior to her announcement. “Well, Mom, I know, but Hanna and Jessica are my friends; you’re my Mom.” ‘Guess I’ve been told of my place in her life.

WHERE DO RED-HEADED BABIES COME FROM?

After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician. 'Doctor,' the man said, 'I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be mine!!' 'Nonsense,' the doctor said'. 'Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have contributed red hair to the gene pool.' 'It isn't possible,' the man insisted.'? 'This can't be; our families on both sides had jet-black hair for generations.' 'Well,' said the doctor, 'let me ask you this. How often do you have sex?' The man seemed a bit ashamed. 'I've been working very hard for the past year. We only made love once or twice every few months.' 'Well, there you have it!' The doctor said confidently…'It's rust.'

I received a birthday card from my dear friend Melodie. It says, “Good friends make each other laugh. Really good friends go for the snort.” Y’all this is so appropriate about Mel and me when we start talking to each other. One of us usually snorts with laughter and the other gets misplaced tears. I think we’re headed for oxygen tanks so we won’t have to stop talking/laughing and try to breathe.

When my friend asked me what rules I live by, I told her I had 21…. 10 from the Bible, 7 from the Marines, and these 4: DRINK, STEAL, SWEAR, and LIE. She gasped. I told her, “DRINK from the ‘everlasting cup’ every day. STEAL a moment to help someone who is worse off than you, if you can’t do for them, then say a prayer for them. SWEAR that you will be a better person today than you were yesterday. LIE down at night thanking God you live in America and have freedom.

One morning I asked Stephen, age teen-who-knows-it-all, to bring his bushel basket of dirty clothes, with the dirty clothes in it, to me in the laundry room. He knows that if they are not in the laundry room, I won't wash his clothes. He questioned, "Why do you need to wash them? They're not piled as high as my dresser, yet." I don't know if there is some contest going on which I'm not privy enough to know about, or if this is another one of his "measurement challenges" coupled with bragging rights. I do know that there is something about a huge pile of leaves and a huge pile of one's dirty laundry which fascinates boys.

Brenduhh came over all flustered and perplexed. I fixed her some tea and found some cookies she liked. “Well, what seems to be the problem?” I soothed. She said, “Don’t let anyone ever tell you a library has all sorts of information you’d ever want to know about all the dinosaurs. I was there for 2 hours looking for this one particular one and couldn’t find it in any book.” She showed me the name of it---THESAURUS. I felt I was in for a futile discussion on words and similarities.

“Friendship isn’t about whom you’ve known the longest. It’s about who came and never left your side.” I think of my parents when I read this about friendship, and I think of my husband, Guy, my daughter Della, son Dane, and daughter-in-law Jessie. None of them have ever left me when I needed them. I am blessed.

No sooner is the rage of hunger appeased than it becomes difficult to comprehend the meaning of starvation. It is only when you suffer that you really understand. -Jules Verne, science fiction author (1828-1905) Have you ever noticed when someone has come to you talking about a trouble they’re having, there is a similarity to one you had and got through? This is empathy tucked into sympathy. I’ve wondered, during the tough times, what purpose is being served as I try to endure. Then, down the road I find out: it is either to make me stronger, more aware, or to help another who might not believe they’ll get through it, too. I have sympathy for someone when they talk of their troubles, but I have more empathy and this is what courses my advice when I’m asked for it. Sympathy does not invite one to grow---empathy does.

Recently I had to deal with someone who is duplicitous, oppositional, sociopathic, self-serving, and inconsiderate of others and their feelings—a real nasty. Guy heard me breathe a sign of relief when they left. He put the whole encounter into perspective, “Well, you had to deal with that person for only 15 minutes; they have to live with themselves a lifetime.” That statement is so true, and it helps me deal with others who are very difficult or nasty.

When I was teaching in the summer, I had all sorts of kids....usually the slower track ones. I always included parts of speech in my summer lessons. One year I had one of the most popular boys in school. He had quite a reputation for scoring, but wasn't in any of the athletics. I was introducing PREPOSITIONS. I mentioned that this part of speech dealt with "positions" of a noun in relationship with another one or pronoun. I happened to look at him and saw the biggest smile on his face. "Jack, quit thinking and focus on parts of speech!!" I semi-growled. He said, "I am, Mrs. R. If you knew of the prepositions I know and have used, you'd smile, too." The class went up for grabs, and I had the biggest laugh of the summer.

Affliction, like the iron-smith, shapes as it smites.
Christian Bovee, lawyer and author (1820-1904)

If you have a cat, did you know that it is “crepuscular”? That means: more active at twilight--dawn and dusk. Nocturnal means active at night like Dracula. “Blahhhh”.

Brenduhh was in church with me. She’d been gone for a few weeks due to migraines. It came time for our minister to ask if anyone had “Joys or Concerns” for prayer. Brenduhh stood up and said, “Yes, I do. I had a brain scan, as most of you know. Nothing was found.” Some nodded in praise, some nodded in confirmation, and some had their hands over their mouth.

The restaurant wasn’t very crowded, but there was a clatter of dishes. Stephen, age 17 with an already very deep bass voice, was talking louder than was necessary. I said, “Honey, lower your voice some, please.” He mistook the “lower your voice” to mean in pitch, not volume, and he did. Have you ever heard a basso profundo (lowest bass voice) speaking? That is what he spoke in. Think of J.D. Sumner of the STAMPS singing group, Trace Adkins (only lower), or Josh Turner (again, only lower) speaking to you.

We were discussing Lent and giving something up during that period of 6 weeks. The discussion when around the table with the last one announcing, “I’m giving up Brussels sprouts for Lent.” Some praised this child, but I squinted my eyes at them and asked, “Why Brussels sprouts? You don’t even like them.” “Well, if I should start liking them I will have given them up for 6 weeks. So, that is why I gave them up.” For some reason this was logical to a teenager. IDIOT SIGHTING: When a woman and her hubby arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up their car, they were told the keys had been locked in it. They went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door. As the wife watched from the passenger side, she instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," she announced to the technician, "its open!" His reply, "I know. I already got that side." This was at the Ford Dealership in Canton, Mississippi. I bought something in a hard-to-open wrap. I got it open. Parts were missing; I took it back. The cretin behind the counter told me they couldn't take it back---it was open. I said, "How could I know if all the parts were there if I don't open it?" Too bad...it was store policy. I asked, "So if no one finds your body, you aren't dead?" Priceless look, and I got a refund.

Sometimes it pays to ask questions.

Peace and smiles to you, Trudy