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2014 December Newsletter

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  • 2014 December Newsletter

    2014 December “FMP” (From My Perspective)

    In memory of a brilliant man, Robin Williams. This is from the TV show MORK AND MINDY. Orson was a voice/entity from the planet Ork where Mork was from. Mork (played by Robin Williams) would have to answer to him every evening.
    Orson: The report, Mork. Mork: This week I discovered a terrible disease called loneliness. Orson: Do many people on Earth suffer from this disease? Mork: Oh yes sir, and how they suffer. One man I know suffers so much he has to take a medication called bourbon, even that doesn't help very much because then he can hear paint dry. Orson: Does bed rest help? Mork: No because I've heard that sleeping alone is part of the problem. You see, Orson, loneliness is a disease of the spirit. People who have it think that no one cares about them. Orson: Do you have any idea why? Mork: Yes sir you can count on me. You see, when children are young, they're told not to talk to strangers. When they go to school, they're told not to talk to the person next to them. Finally when they're very old, they're told not to talk to themselves, who's left? Orson: Are you saying Earthlings make each other lonely? Mork: No sir I'm saying just the opposite. They make themeslves lonely, they're so busy looking out for number one that there's not enough room for two. Orson: It's too bad everybody down there can't get together and find a cure. Mork: Here's the paradox sir because if they did get together, they wouldn't need one.

    Just think, if you said, “HELLO” to one person and truly meant, “How are you today?” you might quell that person’s loneliness for a short period of time and give them hope that “at least one person cared about me today.”

    A brave person said to me one day, “Trudy, you are aging.” After I questioned whether or not I wanted to relinquish my freedom, I countered with, “Nope, I’m not aging. I’m ripening to perfection.” I told Mother one day she seemed to be sweating. She squinted her hazel eyes and said, “I do NOT sweat; I glisten.” This I always remember when the “power surges” of middle age came----I did not sweat; I glistened.”
    "Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Forget about the ones who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it & if it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would most likely be worth it." ENJOY LIFE NOW - IT HAS AN EXPIRATION DATE!

    And then Satan said, “Put the alphabet in math!” Oh good grief, yes he did. Algebra is the Devil's math. Only he would put numbers and letters together and expect you to come up with a number that makes sense. I tried to figure out a way to pass Algebra using the letters-numbers combination. So, as I’d seen, I assigned each letter a number. So when the problem was 5x = 25, my teacher marked my answer wrong. I said, “How could that be wrong? X is #24 in the alphabet. So 5 times 24 is 120 = 25. Subtract -120 from 25 and you get -95, so x equals -95.” The teacher looked at me as though I’d lost my mind. He said, “Trudy, only you would come up with that rationale. It is interesting; however, you are right, but you are wrong.” Well that statement was about as confusing as ALGEBRA. I dropped the class.

    My Beloved was a very intelligent man. He’d studied at a major university in Illinois, taken and completed all the political science classes offered before he was a junior and graduated with 3 honor societies as part of his achievement. He taught civics (law) and geography at the high school level for 36 years. I learned a lot from him, especially law. I asked him one day why he’d not chosen to be an attorney. He wisely said, “I wanted to teach.” “Well, then, why didn’t you teach at the university level?” I inquired. His response was, “I wanted to teach minds which had not formulated strong opinions before they found out the facts and truth. I wanted to watch young minds grow, not just fill them with information and such.” And, that is exactly what he did for 36 years. He was one of the most revered teachers at the high school where he taught.

    Three nuns were attending a Yankees’ baseball game. Three men were sitting directly behind them. Because their habits were partially blocking the view, the men decided to badger the nuns, hoping they'd get annoyed enough to move to another area. In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I’m going to move to Utah. There are only 100 nuns living there!" Then the second guy spoke up and said loudly, "I want to move to Montana. There are only 50 nuns living there!" The third guy yelled, "I want to go to Idaho. There are only 25 nuns living there!" The mother superior turned around, looked at the men and, in a very sweet and calm voice said, "Why don't you go to hell…there aren't any nuns there."
    Recently during some moments of intense fellowship with my 21 year old, I told him, “Please listen to me. I am older than you are and have experienced a lot. I know what I’m talking about.” He stopped, briefly thought and said, “Oh Mom!!! Just wait until I am older than I am.” I had to walk away; his rationale was off base and headed toward the outfield of irrational.

    JOKE TIME: After a meeting several days ago, I couldn't find my keys. I quickly gave myself a personal "TSA Pat Down." They weren't in my pockets. Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car. Frantically,
    I headed for the parking lot. My husband has scolded me many times for leaving my keys in the car's ignition. He's afraid that the car could be stolen. As I looked around the parking lot, I realized he was right. The parking lot was empty. I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all to my husband: "I left my keys in the car and it's been stolen."There was a moment of silence. I thought the call had been disconnected, but then I heard his voice. "Are you kidding me?" he barked, "I dropped you off!" Now it was my turn to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, "Well, come and get me." He retorted, "I will, as soon as I convince this cop that I didn't steal your damn car!" This reminds me of the time I went to the mall. We had 2 vans exactly alike, but mine was red and my red VW Bug. I finished my shopping and went to where I thought I’d parked the van. It wasn’t there. I walked up and down many aisles looking for it. I couldn’t remember which one I’d driven, so I called Guy and asked him which one was in the garage. He told me, “Two of the three of them are. Why?” I thought for sure I’d lost my mind. “Well, I can’t remember how I got here. What did I drive, damn it.” There was a moment of silence. Then he said, “First off, my name is NOT “damn it”. Secondly, you drove the VW Bug, Honey. Hurry home, I miss you.” He was the only person who could calm my “stormy seas.”

    A recent article in the Dominion Post reported that a woman, Anne Maynard, has sued Wellington Hospital, saying that after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex. A hospital spokesman replied: "Mr. Maynard was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct his eyesight!"
    My friend, Barbara Sue, had to have a colonoscopy. I had one of those horrid procedures. The gallon of "poops a lot" was the worse stuff I'd ever tasted. Then I had a gal take me to the procedure room only to have her take me to ONCOLOGY. I would have pooped out of fear and concern they knew something I didn’t know, but I had nothing to deliver. When she got me to the right place, they positioned me at the camera and I was EXPOSED!! I didn’t realize they had a wide lens camera in that department. The doc came in and introduced himself. "Hi! I'm Dr. Woo Wee." I went to sleep shortly after the introduction, or I passed out…I can't remember.

    Nothing great in the world has been accomplished without passion. -Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, philosopher (1770-1831) Please think about the things you’ve done which you consider GREAT….good mother, good spouse, good employee, etc. If you didn’t like doing the job, the outcome would not have been as positive as it became.
    I saw this written on a t-shirt the other day: I DON’T MEAN TO INTERRUPT PEOPLE. I JUST RANDOMLY REMEMBER THINGS AND GET ALL EXCITED. Kriminies, in my case I have to blurt them out before I forget them.

    The memories I have of the loved ones who are not with me at this season keep me from going NUTZ at the empty places in my mind's heart. That is why it is so important to make good memories to comfort us when that is all we have. Certain odors bring back where I was with certain loved ones. Certain sounds, do the same. I stand in the wind to listen to their whispers to me, and I call out my "I love you and miss you" to them. Then, I smile and know we are at peace. I sometimes think, "If I just had one more moment, minute, or hour with them, I would....." and a memory comes flooding me. There's that time I wanted, and I smile with glistening eyes and tightness in my throat.
    If you are a “Facebooker”, you know that someone can unfriend you. When it happens to me I look at it as….the trash has taken itself out.
    BITCHCRAFT: “the art of honking people off by telling them the truth.” I’m a wizard at this.

    NEVER STAND IN LINE AGAIN (Gen. Stanley McChrystal) Some men carry and handle their diplomacy better than others. When former U.S. Military commander in Afghanistan, Stanley McChrystal, was called into the Oval Office by Barack Obama, he knew things weren't going to go well when the President accused him of not supporting him in his political role as President. "It's not my job to support you as a politician, Mr. President, it's my job to support you as Commander-in-Chief," McChrystal replied, and he handed Obama his resignation. Not satisfied with accepting McChrystal's resignation the President made a cheap parting shot. "I bet when I die you'll be happy to pee on my grave." The General saluted. "Mr. President, I always told myself after leaving the Army I'd never stand in line again." This was sent to me by a friend, so I don’t know if it’s true or not. It is very fitting, though, in my opinion.

    Have you noticed crime and violence is rampant? Well, we are to blame for that. All the telephone booths were removed; now Superman has no place to change.
    “It is usually when you fear facing yourself that you get mean.” Hmmm, ‘hadn’t thought of that.

    "They've a temper, some of them -- particularly verbs, they're the proudest -- adjectives you can do anything with, but not verbs -- however, I can manage the whole lot of them!" boasts Humpty-Dumpty in Lewis Carroll's 1872 classic, Through the Looking Glass. All the parts of speech tell me something. Some of my students had trouble with prepositions. I told them, “PREPOSITION” has the word position in it.” They were relieved.

    The best KARATE instructor of all: a spider web in your face.
    In November, I went to the voting place. I started to do all sorts of moves…the Charleston, the Monkey, the Slide, the Twist. Some one asked me what I was doing. I said, “Poll dancing!” You should have seen their face.

    Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, blessings and smiles. As always, Trudy
    Whether you think you can or think you can''re right.

    "There is no try; you either do or don't." Yoda