February 2011 FROM MY PERSPECTIVE

[Trudy in Illinois]

2011 FEBRUARY

The violet is such a simple little flower, but it says so much to me. It appears quietly and unobtrusive among the blades of green grass. If I had my way, the whole lawn would be violets so I could enjoy its gorgeous, royal to light purple color and smell the gentle, heavenly scent. As I look into the yellow middle, I see an angel, not a face as most people see. To me, this is truly a flower sent from Heaven.
A beautiful thing is never perfect. -Egyptian proverb

A handful of 7-year-old children were asked, “What do you think of beer?” Here are some interesting responses:
‘I think beer must be good. My dad says the more beer
he drinks, the prettier my mom gets.' --Tim, 7 years old
'Beer makes my dad sleepy and we get to watch what we
want on television when he is asleep, so beer is
nice.' --Melanie, 7 years old
'My Mom and Dad both like beer. My Mom gets funny
when she drinks it and takes her top off at parties,
but Dad doesn't think this is very funny.'--Grady, 7
'My Mom and Dad talk funny when they drink beer and
the more they drink the more they give kisses to each
other, which is a good thing.'--Toby, 7 years old
‘My Dad gets funny on beer. He is funny. He also wets
his pants sometimes, so he shouldn't have too much.
--Sarah, 7 years old
'My Dad loves beer. The more he drinks, the better he dances. One time he danced right into the pool.' -Lilly, 7 years old
'I don't like beer very much. Every time Dad drinks it, he burns the sausages on the barbecue and they taste disgusting.' Ethan, 7 years old
'I give Dad's beer to the dog and he goes to sleep.' Shirley, 7 years old

“Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy.” Nora Ephron, novelist

Stephen and I were talking about being buried at Arlington National Cemetery . I asked him what he thought the qualifications were to be buried there. He thought a moment and very seriously said, “I think the first qualification would be you’d have to be dead.” He was serious, folks, and I about split trying not to laugh.

A LITTLE THREE YEAR OLD BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET. HIS MOTHER THINKS HE HAS BEEN IN THERE TOO LONG, SO SHE GOES IN TO SEE WHAT'S UP. THE LITTLE BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET READING A BOOK. BUT ABOUT EVERY 10 SECONDS OR SO HE PUTS THE BOOK DOWN, GRIPS ONTO TO THE TOILET SEAT WITH HIS LEFT HAND AND HITS HIMSELF ON TOP OF THE HEAD WITH HIS RIGHT HAND. HIS MOTHER SAYS: "BILLY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? YOU'VE BEEN IN HERE FOR A WHILE. BILLY SAYS: "I'M FINE, MOMMY. I JUST HAVEN'T GONE 'DOODY' YET." MOTHER SAYS: "OK, YOU CAN STAY HERE A FEW MORE MINUTES.BUT, BILLY, WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF ON THE HEAD?" BILLY SAYS: "WORKS FOR KETCHUP."

The big guy and I were talking about places with interesting names.He was wondering where Indian Creek, IL was. My response was, “Oh, probably right next to Whoopie Tie Yie Yea, IL.” He told me to go away. I came back with, “What is the capital of Indianapolis?” “Indianapolis IS a capital!” he growled. I came back with, “The letter “I”.” Another plate of “GO AWAY” was ordered.

In a Purdue University classroom, they were discussing the qualifications to be President of the United States. It was pretty simple the candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age.However, Brenduhh was in the class and immediately started in on how unfair the requirement to be a natural born citizen was. In short, her opinion was that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president. The class was taking it in and letting her rant, and not many jaws hit the floor when she wrapped up her argument by stating "What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by C-section?" Yep, these are the same kind of 18-year-olds that just voted in our last election! They Walk Among US---they breed, too.
I mentioned to the Big Guy that he needed to do s omething. Evidently it didn’t set with him and he growled, “If I were perfect, you’d be out of a job!”

Nothing sucks more like that moment during an argument when you realize you are wrong.

Memorable events in February: Ground Hog’s Day; Abraham Lincoln’s birthday; Valentine’s Day; George Washington’s birthday; American Heart Month; American History month,; Black History month; Children’s Dental Health month; International Friendship month,; National Cherry, Embroidery, Grapefruit, Snack Food, Bird Feeding month; and Responsible Pet owners’ month. Elmo of Sesame Street’s birthday is the 3rd. The Day the Music Died/3rd; National Gumdrop Day/15th; planet Pluto discovered/18th (like where is it now?); Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood debuted Feb. 19th; Levi Strauss’ birthday/26th. Now which one do you think PETA is trying to change? Gods! Some things just need to be left alone. They got all up in arms about an Olympic ice skater wearing a small piece of Artic fox on his costume. His great come-back was: “That’s interesting. All the skaters are wearing skates made out of cow hide and you’re picking at my little piece of fur.”

Obesity is a mental state, a disease brought on by boredom and disappointment. Cyril Connolly, critic and editor (1903-1974) Well, yeah!!! I’m disappointed I’m fat.

Brenduhh came over all excited and told me to hurry outside. Someone had stolen my van. I asked her if she’d seen who did it and could identify them. She replied, “No, but I got the license number for you.” I can’t print what I said, but I can demonstrate it---*&(^(*&)_= (*)()+#$$^%!!

Guy’d been bugging me about totaling all the mileage for a year to use on our income tax deductions. He mentioned it again and again for about 6 days. He started down his list of possibilities where as I indicated I'd already calculated it. "When did you do all that?” he asked in astonishment. "This morning on the calculator when the kids were having breakfast," I quipped. I held up one finger and said, "I had to do something with this finger." He told me to go away.

Be good and you will be lonesome. -Mark Twain, author and humorist (1835-1910)

Brenduhh’s brother was driving down the road when he saw a sign---LOBSTER TAIL AND BEER. “Shazaam! Those are my 3 favorite things.” John was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets,' and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs. He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced. This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the bells. John's favorite rooster, old Perky, was a very fine specimen, but this morning he noticed old Perky's bell hadn't rung at all! When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters coming, could run for cover. To John's amazement, old Perky had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of old Perky, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges. The result was the judges not only awarded old Perky the No Bell Piece Prize, but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well. Clearly old Perky was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.
BEFITTING NAMES---Tim Burr---lumberjack; “Sweets” Maker---baker; Ben Stuck---tailor; Linden Sum---banker; Will Wright---author; Summer Piqnick---basket maker; Shyne Soon Moon---astronomer; Braden Hairr---beautician; Tudy Dumpp---garbage collector

Women are Angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly---on a broomstick. We are flexible.

"If you are what you eat...and you don't know what you are eating...do you know who you are?" Claude Fischler
This sounds more like what Hubby Dearest would say---“What is this; I can’t identify it; do I have to eat it?”

For money you can have everything it is said. No, that is not true. You can buy food, but not appetite; medicine, but not health; soft beds, but not sleep; knowledge but not intelligence; glitter, but not comfort; fun, but not pleasure; acquaintances, but not friendship; servants, but not faithfulness; grey hair, but not honor; quiet days, but not peace. The shell of all things you can get for money. But not the kernel---that cannot be had for money. -Arne Garborg, writer (1851-1924)

I saw in the paper that the wedding between Melissa Kattz and Derrick Alley had gone astray.

My friend Melodie used to live in Hawaii. She sent me this interesting piece of information: I was reading the Kauai news as usual, and came across the news of last year's births. I had forgotten the long names that are sometimes given Hawaiian children. The names are longer than the babies! Kind of like the little HawaiiState fish, the Humuhumunukunukuapua'a.
Here is just a sampling. KUWAMURA-BACIO — Jamelyn and James Bacio greeted their third child, a girl, Kailyn Jeanette ann-Leina‘ala Ku‘uipo Celestine Masai Kuwamura-Bacio SCHMIDT — Chelise Carlos-Kahalekomo and Andy Schmidt greeted their first child, a girl, Kairie Ula Lena Ka U‘i O Kaohikukapulani Kahalekomo Schmidt.

Monday Stephen was horrible, Tuesday evening I was talking to God about him coming to see Him but remembered one of HIS commandments---Thou Shalt Not Kill---He didn't say anything about "maim"; this morning and, knock on wood 3 times, he's a doll with co-operation coming out the wahh-zoo. During Stephen’s ranting, Tara said, "Mom, I'm ready to be an only child." I about fell over and didn't dare let her see my laughing. However, there really was some truth to it. With Stephen, every day is a brand new one with little or no residual remembrance of what he should and shouldn’t do from the previous ones. Some of that is welcomed, some of it is feared. For the childless---See what you’re missing?

The other day someone referred to a friend of mine as “plus size”. I can identify with that, BUT to me it sounds like an order at a fast food place---“Do you want to plus size your fries?” What if food orders were put into the same categories as women’s clothing: petite, juniors, regular, and plus size? When it comes to cheesecake in a restaurant, it seems PETITE is the thought process instead of PLUS SIZE.
I have a friend whose son is already practicing time- management. Here is her report: "Mom, I love a good sneeze...it blows all the junk out at once. I don't have to pick as much."

14 year old Tara reports to me that Zach was so glad to see her after his vacation that he gave her a hug. Teasingly I asked her if he’d kissed her too. Very definitively she said, “Mom, do you see his lip prints on mine?”

Here are two interesting words and “occupations”:
Moirologist (moy-ROL-uh-jist) noun; A hired mourner. From Greek moira (fate, death) + logos (word).] Claque, noun; a group of people hired to applaud a performer at a show. Some people I have known would have both at their funeral. (Oh I know that’s awful.)

FOOD FOR THOUGHT: A kind word never broke anyone's mouth.

Until next month, I remain as always, Trudy ♥ ♫ ♪

[mspete]

Thank you for this "Perspective"! I had tears in my eyes from reading and responding to "Letting Go". This brought tears of laughter to my eyes. You put into words so many of the feelings and emotions that we feel. Thanks for sharing with us each month!

[Trudy in Illinois]

I don't know about your neck of the woods, but it is polar bear cold here in central IL!!!!!!!!

[mspete]

It snowed for 3 - 4 hours here tonight. I hope to get some pictures of the trees and shrubery tomorrow morning. It looks like it is beautiful! The forecast is for it to be warmer tomorrow and all the snow will be gone by noon. It is 30 degrees now (1:27 am). Glad I don't have to go anywhere! Stay warm.

[MadClikr]

It's 23 degrees here now, around 18 this time yesterday. We did get a little snow, but not too much. I'm jealous of my family visiting Florida right now, I hear it's in the 60-70's there... palm trees, sandy beaches...

I didn't sleep well last night at all. The air was really dry and cold, and the heat kept buzzing. It's gas heat, and for some reason it doesn't always like to start up right away, it just sits there and buzzes until 1) it starts or 2) it gives up. We've had people come out and look at it a few times, they've replaced a few parts, but it hasn't helped with the buzzing, and nobody seems to know why... the only thing I know to do is to blow into the furnace (we usually use a can of compressed air, it's easier), and then it will start. I hope we find a new place soon! I actually dreamed about it last night... now, we just need to find it!

[Trudy in Illinois]

Y'all are having a heat wave compared to me. My freezer is warmer than it is outside right now.

[mspete]

Our new pastor is from somewhere in Illinois. He had visitors with him at church last Sunday and said that if the weather did not clear up and get warmer they would think he was lying about Alabama weather. Well, if they are still here they are probably strongly doubting anything he says! It is cold (around freezing) snow is everywhere. The trees are beautiful with the snow covered branches. The streets are okay because the ground was warm when it started snowing. The forecast for early next week is in the 60's. I'm ready!

[Trudy in Illinois]

Oh hush your mouth, sadist Sadie!!!!!!!!!

[MadClikr]

I'm not expecting to see weather in the 60's for a couple of months yet. DH and I have been wanting to take another trip out to Montana to visit family, but it's even colder there! I proposed that we all meet up somewhere warm, Hawaii comes to mind, they all agreed, but only to the idea, I don't think any of them will show up.

[Trudy in Illinois]

The Canada geese were going north yesterday, honking encouragement to those who'd rather be still in warmer temperatures. There are robins all over the place, too. 99% of the snow is melted and the Illinois River is getting higher. Now we're looking at flooding season. I'm not affected because we live 5 miles up a hill from the river. If there were concern, I'd beat Noah on building an ark. I would be more selective to the 2 by 2's, too. No snakes, mosquitoes, flies, or Japanese lady bugs.